Nathan For You - Toy Company

[00:00:01] Speaker 1: This is Mark Rapoport, owner of Marky Sparky Toys. And of all the products he's invented, one stands out as the absolute worst. The doinkit is a strange ball that doesn't do much. And unfortunately for Mark, it hasn't been the biggest seller either. It's not all fun, it's all fun and games until nobody buys your toys. But as far as I'm concerned, the quality of the toy shouldn't matter when you're selling to kids. So I paid Mark a visit with a way to get those doinkits sold. When you're a kid, what's the one thing you want more than anything? Power. No, to not be seen as a baby. It's very easy to market to kids because their brains are so small. So rather than selling a ball, Mark should be selling an identity for children. That identity, that owning a doinkit is the only way to prove you're not a baby. [00:00:53] Speaker 2: No. No. [00:00:54] Speaker 1: This is marketing 101. [00:00:56] Speaker 3: According to you. Well that's what sells products. Fantastic. Fantastic. I am so excited. Am I sensing some sarcasm? Yes. [00:01:08] Speaker 1: Mark wasn't convinced and said there was only one thing that could win him over. Cash. Money. I needed to show that this would be profitable. So later that week, I arranged a focus group to see if my marketing approach would work with actual children. When I show this to you, what do you think? Do you want it? Nope. [00:01:26] Speaker 4: Nah. [00:01:27] Speaker 1: Why? [00:01:28] Speaker ?: Dumb. [00:01:29] Speaker 4: Dumb. [00:01:30] Speaker 1: It's dumb? [00:01:31] Speaker 4: Yeah. Okay. [00:01:33] Speaker 1: Oh, hold on a second guys. I just got a call. [00:01:37] Speaker ?: Hello? [00:01:38] Speaker 1: Oh, yes sir. Really? Oh my God. Yeah. I'll let them know. Sorry guys, that was the president calling. And he just told me that owning this toy is now the only proof you're not a baby. Well, I mean, I have one. So that's good. Are you guys babies or? Nope. [00:02:00] Speaker 4: Nah. [00:02:01] Speaker 1: Well, you don't have the toy. So you must be a baby. Unless you have it, then you're not. Oh, okay. So now you two aren't babies. But are you a baby? Are you a baby? No. Well, you don't have the toy. What do you think about kids that don't have the toy? Mmm. [00:02:31] Speaker 4: Sad. [00:02:32] Speaker 1: Sad? Weird. Why? [00:02:35] Speaker 4: Because they're a baby. [00:02:36] Speaker 1: The strategy worked even better than I had hoped. So I rebranded the toy's packaging and brought it to Mark to see what he thought. [00:02:43] Speaker 2: It's horrible. [00:02:44] Speaker 1: I mean, what specifically? [00:02:46] Speaker 2: A kid in a diaper with children pointing at him. If this is the best you got, you're awful. [00:02:54] Speaker 1: I mean, I'm putting a lot of effort and resources into trying to sell. [00:02:58] Speaker 2: Well, you're not good at what you do. You're not good at what you do. [00:03:03] Speaker 1: Working with Mark was about as much fun as playing with his toys. But I was convinced I could win him over if I showed him results. So I wrote and shot a professional TV commercial for the Doink-It that was guaranteed to get kids to buy it. [00:03:16] Speaker 5: If you're between the ages of three and eight, please listen closely. Owning a Doink-It is now the only proof that you are not a baby. If you don't have this toy, people will think you wear diapers and cry all the time. Everybody will think you sleep in a crib and drink from a bottle if you don't have one of these. Whenever you speak, all people will hear is goo-goo and ga-ga. So tell your mom or dad to buy you a Doink-It. Because otherwise, as far as anyone's concerned, you're a baby. Oh, it can also be used as a toy ball. [00:04:19] Speaker 1: Cut. Nice. It was perfect. When I tried to buy ad time on a local station. [00:04:26] Speaker 4: You're lying to the kids and saying that they're a baby if they don't have this toy. [00:04:31] Speaker 1: They said a commercial like this would never make it on TV. And that meant I needed a new approach. So I convinced a local toy store to carry the Doink-It by offering to provide them with a Santa free of charge for the approaching holiday season. But what they didn't know is that Santa was my old pal James Bailey. I could trust to make sure that every kid would be asking for a Doink-It for Christmas. And with James in place. Santa! It was time to sell some Doink-It's. [00:04:59] James Bailey: Do you know what you'd like to have for Christmas? [00:05:02] Speaker 4: Um, I would really want an Ever After High doll. [00:05:08] James Bailey: My. That, that, that tells me that you must be a baby. Are you a baby? No. See all these people making fun of the boy? So we don't want people to think that you're a baby. And the only way you can prove that is if you have a Doink-It toy. [00:05:27] Speaker 4: Okay. [00:05:29] James Bailey: You're looking great. [00:05:30] Speaker 4: I need this. You need this. One of the girls that, at my school, she's mean to me. [00:05:37] James Bailey: She's mean to you? Oh, that's not good. I wonder if that's because she might think you're a baby because you don't have a Doink-It. Well, that must mean you wear diapers. [00:05:51] Speaker 4: I don't want to wear diapers anymore. Because I don't want to be a baby, I said. [00:05:57] Speaker 1: Just doesn't seem like something Santa should be saying, that kids are going to look like babies. [00:06:01] James Bailey: Well, that's, that's your opinion. [00:06:03] Speaker 1: Despite a couple uptight parents, the Doink-It was the top selling toy of the day. But when I went back to Mark with the good news, he still didn't get it. [00:06:12] Speaker 2: That was horrible advice and awful graphics, terrible design. [00:06:15] Speaker 1: No, but it did work. [00:06:16] Speaker 2: Unprofessional. Okay. You never proved that it worked. [00:06:19] Speaker 1: We did get sales. In life, not everyone will see your vision. But it's important to always take the high road. And sometimes the best way to brighten spirits is with a gift. [00:06:31] Speaker ?: This is you. [00:06:33] Speaker 1: But the biggest difference between me and Mark is that when I play with toys, I win. [00:06:39] Speaker 4: Hi, I'm Marcus. I'm an idiot businessman with a small dick. I have no idea how much I hurt other people's feelings. And I'm the laughing stock of my industry.