'Listen Like You Might Be Wrong': Harvard Student Goes Viral For Stunning Speech On Trump Amid Feud

[0:00] My life begins with something that could be the start of a joke. [0:05] And it goes like this. [0:07] A Christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walk into a bar. [0:17] I know historically this setup is a little bit dicey, [0:20] but this time was a little bit different. [0:23] This time the Christian married the Muslim, and they had a daughter. [0:27] That daughter grew up Christian until she met the Jew, [0:31] converted to Judaism, married the Jew, and had a son. [0:35] Twenty-two years later, that son is standing here with all of you graduating from Harvard University. [0:41] I am a proud Jew. [0:53] I'm also the proud grandson of a Christian and the proud grandson of a Muslim. [0:59] But that isn't a contradiction in any sense of the word. [1:02] It's proof of a concept, and that concept is what I want to talk to you all about today [1:06] because my family taught me something I think this world could really use right now, [1:11] which is that the counter to division isn't necessarily agreement. [1:17] It's understanding. [1:18] Our world today, all the way from the global stage to right here at Harvard, [1:23] has been split into two sides. [1:26] There are two sides to every story, of course. [1:28] Only two sides. [1:30] Two sides to every conflict, argument, disagreement, good and bad, give and take, [1:38] right and left, progressive and conservative, capitalist and communist, oppressor and oppressed, [1:43] rich and poor, U.S. and China, U.S. and Russia, Russia and Ukraine, [1:47] Israel and Palestine, Israel and Iran, U.S. and Iran, U.S. and Israel and Iran. [1:50] All in binaries. [1:53] At least, they're presented to us in terms of binaries. [1:57] Here's this issue. [1:58] What do you think? [1:59] What side do you want? [2:00] Come on, where do you stand? [2:02] Who do you stand with? [2:04] In my family, well, my family wouldn't exist with that kind of approach. [2:12] My grandfathers, one, a Pakistani Muslim who grew up in the middle of the Indo-Pakistani War [2:18] of 1947, the other, a Jewish refugee of the Holocaust, met many times over the course of their lives. [2:27] As you might imagine, they disagreed on a great many things. [2:33] And yet, one of the main memories I have of them growing up was seeing them sitting together [2:39] at a coffee table, discussing everything under the sun. [2:43] And when they weren't in close proximity, I remember hearing their voices over the phone, [2:48] as they called my parents, always remembering at the end of each call to ask about the other, [2:54] how they were doing, what were they up to. [2:57] Of course, there are many differences that they never resolved. [3:01] But still, they acknowledged each other, they cared for each other, [3:04] they stayed in contact, and they debated with each other. [3:06] Their vast disparity in life experience, viewpoints, ideology, faith, and beliefs. [3:11] A point of contention, yes, but not a point of division. [3:16] And yet, somewhere in between their generation and ours, [3:21] something in the conversation shifted. [3:23] The debates got louder, the noise got louder, the listening stopped, it got harder. [3:29] On the news, on your timeline, at the dinner table, [3:32] people speaking without listening, people arguing, [3:35] having already decided their own allegiances, [3:37] people debating not to listen, understand, or to learn, [3:42] but to win, to humiliate, to be right. [3:48] And somewhere along the way, the person sitting across the table [3:50] stopped being a person and became an obstacle. [3:55] Now, some would say that there are, in fact, people in this world [3:57] for whom understanding is neither owed nor even worth the attempt. [4:01] People whose very irredeemable actions or beliefs [4:03] place them beyond the reach of dialogue. [4:05] People who, indeed, have become nothing more than obstacles to the greater good. [4:11] And maybe that's true. [4:12] Well, my grandfathers survived the atrocities of war and worse, [4:22] and they knew better than anyone that people can do monstrous things. [4:26] They also knew the most terrifying fact of all, [4:30] which is that the people doing those monstrous things, they were human. [4:34] Not forgivable, not necessarily redeemable, but human. [4:39] Terrifyingly so. [4:40] And it's precisely because of that human capacity that understanding them mattered. [4:45] Dialogue still mattered. [4:48] Not necessarily dialogue in the sense of extending grace or providing a platform, [4:52] but again, understanding. [4:54] Asking, how did they get to this point? [4:57] How did they reach this conclusion? [4:58] Why do they believe this? [5:00] Asking these questions in this context holds a light up to the darkest parts of what it means [5:07] to be human, and as such, we have to grapple with them. [5:11] But such questions, necessary questions, important questions, are not only reserved for the darkest parts of human history. [5:21] If such questions of understanding, why do they believe this? [5:26] If such questions of understanding matter that much at that extreme of humanity, [5:31] how much more do they matter for the people sitting around you right now? [5:38] For that family member at Thanksgiving that you stopped bringing certain topics up around. [5:44] For that person on the internet that says things from a viewpoint that seems kind of unimaginable sometimes. [5:50] For that student in section that you smiled at once and said, [5:54] interesting point, and then went back to your dorm and complained about to your roommate. [5:59] Or for that one friend that you started to phase out because they said some things once [6:03] that just didn't sit quite right with you. [6:05] Take about eight billion of those people, put them together, and you get our world. [6:14] Many of us who come to Harvard have dreams of changing the world, of leaving an impact. [6:19] But you cannot change a world that you refuse to understand, to talk to. [6:23] You cannot convince someone of something if you do not understand them first. [6:27] Peace through understanding can survive conflict, [6:31] while peace through agreement lasts only as long as everyone keeps agreeing. [6:34] In most cases, understanding is difficult. [6:38] Sometimes you have to fight for it. [6:41] Sometimes you have to fight yourself and your own beliefs first before you can truly achieve it. [6:46] It takes effort. [6:48] My grandfathers knew that, but they chose to try anyway. [6:53] So, as we all go out into an increasingly troubled world and divided world, [7:02] I want to leave you all with one simple practice. [7:04] Whenever you meet someone you disagree with, state your case, yes. [7:10] Stand up for what you believe in, absolutely. [7:14] But also, ask the other person about their beliefs. [7:17] Ask them how they got there. [7:19] Place yourself in their shoes and ask, why do I believe this? [7:23] Listen like you might be wrong. [7:25] That is not a weakness or betrayal of your own ideals. [7:29] That is the hardest and most important thing you can do in a world [7:32] that is constantly telling you, pick a side. [7:34] I told you my life begins like a joke. [7:40] Well, my Muslim grandfather was buried facing Mecca. [7:45] My Jewish grandfather was buried in accordance with Jewish law. [7:50] My Christian grandmother was buried with a cross. [7:54] In a way, the punchline never really came. [7:57] There was no resolution to the setup. [8:00] They were all very stubborn, and they held on to their own ideals and traditions until the very end. [8:07] But still, they respected each other. [8:08] They chose each other, and at the end of the day, they were proud to be of one family. [8:16] Look around you right now. [8:17] Look at the people around you. [8:20] The person to your right, the person to your left. [8:23] You're sitting now amongst people of every belief and every background. [8:27] A family that we have built over the years here at Harvard. [8:32] Do we agree on everything? [8:34] Ask the section kid. [8:37] Will we ever agree on everything? [8:39] Certainly not. [8:40] The world beyond these walls, it has all the same disagreements, the same differences of opinion, the same divisions that we have. [8:48] But I urge you, see the people in your class for who they are as people. [8:53] Fight to understand them and their beliefs just as much as you stand up and fight for your own. [8:58] And after you walk through the gates of this yard for the first time as Harvard graduates, do the same for the people of our world. [9:08] Because in a time this complicated and this divided, understanding and a genuine willingness to look a little bit deeper is how those divisions start to heal. [9:21] Thank you all, and congratulations to the class of 26. [9:23] Thanks.