All Access with Linsey Davis: Emma Grede

[0:04] Welcome to All Access, everyone. I'm Lindsay Davis. She is the co-founder of Good American with Khloe Kardashian, founding partner of Skims with Kim Kardashian. [0:14] She was on Forbes 2025 America's richest self-made women list. And now she is joining us today. Emma Greed, thank you so much for being here. [0:23] Thank you so much for having me. So let's start at the beginning. You grew up in East London. You have a single mom. There are four girls. You're the oldest. [0:31] You're kind of raising them in and out of school. You describe yourself as I'd never heard a parentified child. And there are a lot of people who I think would relate to that background, have shared that, but maybe feel having multiple jobs at the paper route at the deli at 15 years old. [0:50] They're resentful. They're bitter. They're angry. And yet for you, it becomes this gritty character building experience that catapults you into another stratosphere. What do you think set you apart? [1:03] You know, I just never thought that I was unlucky. I always thought that that was just who I was and where I was born. [1:09] And my job was to help my mom out and do what you had to do. I never, ever thought of looking after my, you know, young sisters or the fact that I could make a full dinner by the time I was 12 years old as a disadvantage. [1:21] And it turns out it wasn't, you know. I definitely know there's, you know, a part of me that meant I lacked a little bit of a childhood. [1:30] But it gave me so much more. And I honestly, honestly believe I'm all the better for it. [1:35] And now a mom of four kids, totally opposite childhood for your kids, right? And you have nannies and they're going to private schools and you have discretionary money. [1:43] Are you ever concerned that they won't have the same grit that you have? [1:47] I mean, all day long. How do you get gritty when you live, you know, living in L.A. and how we do? [1:53] But I don't try to burden my children with my own experience, right? [1:56] I want to give them the dignity of their own experience. And what they see every day is their mom get up and go to work and do something that she really loves and has worked hard for. [2:05] And I talk so much in the book and we just spoke about it. Like, I don't apologize for what I'm doing. [2:10] I don't say, oh, guys, you know, I have to be in New York for a couple of days. I'm like, mommy gets to do this thing. [2:15] I spent a long time to get to the point where I could write a book, where I could have this type of career in life. [2:20] And so I really try to share it with them as opposed to make apologies for it. [2:24] When did you realize that your story wasn't just yours, but something that other people really needed to hear? [2:31] Well, you know, that was really surprising to me. And when I came to this country, I came here about nine or ten years ago, [2:37] I started to have people reach out and say, how did you get to where you got to? Like, how do you do what you do? [2:42] And I don't think they're asking to ask me. I think they want to know how they can do it, too. [2:45] And that was the genesis of my book. I wanted to be honest about what it takes, about the tradeoffs, about the things that have given. [2:53] Because I think the social media paints this picture that it's all too easy, that suddenly I popped out of nowhere and became, you know, [2:59] this like incredible person with all of these great things that look so brilliant. [3:03] And the reality is my life has been nothing like that. I have had a job since I was 12 years old. [3:08] I delivered the papers. I worked in a deli. I did all the kind of bottom of the barrel jobs everywhere I went. [3:15] And it's been a really, really long journey to get to where I am now. [3:18] And so I think that we're owed a more accurate picture of what it takes. [3:23] You describe your book, Start With Yourself, as a blueprint for women around the world to dismantle the lies that they have been sold about ambition and work-life balance. [3:34] Give us some of the biggest lies. [3:36] Well, I honestly believe that we as women have been socially conditioned to avoid the exact behaviors that lead to wealth, to opportunity, to leadership, to big positions. [3:46] But it's not all of our fault. Some of this is systemic. Some of this is just ingrained in the culture. [3:51] But what we have to do is understand what is true. What is true for us? [3:55] What is something that we've been told so much, perhaps that it's crass to talk about money, that we shouldn't discuss money so openly? [4:02] I believe that those thoughts keep us really small. They keep us out of the conversation. [4:07] And so what I want women to do is to put money at the center of their plans, to make sure that we are vocal and not hiding behind soft ambition. [4:15] And so, so much of what I talk about is what is the story that you're telling yourself versus what are true? [4:21] What are the beliefs that you've held in your life and in your career for such a long time that it's hard for you to break free from them? [4:29] And so in the book, I really dismantle, like, I'm saying these are the old thoughts and these are the new thoughts that you should replace them with. [4:35] If anything, it's more about being a thought starter. [4:38] I don't expect everybody to agree with me, but I want you to think about the old thoughts deeply. [4:43] Because as soon as you recognize them, you can start to do something about them and work against them and get on the other side of it. [4:48] And you divide the book, the old thoughts and the new thoughts. [4:52] What's one thing that you really hope that women who read your book will unlearn? [4:57] Well, I think somehow there is this idea that if everything isn't perfect, that you shouldn't go for it. [5:03] That if everything isn't lined up perfectly, you're thinking about starting a business, you're thinking about moving into a new job, we are plagued by this idea of perfectionism. [5:12] And it really holds us back. [5:15] When in actual fact, what I know that works is starting before you're ready. [5:18] I know that the stars are never, ever aligned. [5:21] What you've got to do is start. [5:22] You have to get out of the gate and be willing to have mistakes and failure. [5:26] Because resilience is something that is built. [5:28] Confidence is something that's built by going through things. [5:30] You don't just get confident. [5:32] I'm confident now because I've made so many mistakes. [5:35] I've had so many failures. [5:37] And so that's one of the things that I really want to dismantle. [5:40] And I think it's important. [5:41] You talk about that confidence. [5:42] There's one point in the book where you say you're about to go and present and your husband tells you you have an employee mentality. [5:50] Tell us about the employee mentality. [5:53] Tough one. [5:53] Well, again, I think that very often we're looking for somebody else to be our boss. [5:58] We are thinking that everybody knows better than we do. [6:01] And in some situations, you know, it doesn't matter. [6:04] It's like everybody knows more than we do. [6:06] Somehow our experience is, you know, kept quiet and it's made to feel like it doesn't matter. [6:13] And an employee mentality, I think, is something that a lot of people suffer with. [6:17] We outsource our decision making when in actual fact we know what we're doing and there is no perfect resume. [6:24] There is no perfect set of circumstances. [6:26] You've just got to do and figure things out. [6:29] And nine times out of ten, most people are making it up. [6:32] No one is, like, the perfect CEO. [6:34] No one is the perfect executive. [6:35] You've got to put yourself in motion, try things, learn, fail, and figure it out. [6:40] You have this quote in the book that says something to the effect of, if you can't beat the fear, then do it scared. [6:47] And you go on to say yourself that your dreams are bigger than your fears. [6:53] But a lot of people have to imagine they have big dreams. [6:57] But it is fear that keeps them. [6:58] So what's your advice to fighting through the fear? [7:01] My advice is to learn to manage your emotions, and there is a whole section about this in my book. [7:06] Because when you're leading your decision making through your emotions, it's really problematic, whether that be fear, anger, guilt, one that really plagues, you know, a lot of parents. [7:17] And it's really unhealthy. [7:19] What you have to learn to do is work through your emotions, really understand the patterns in your behavior, and make sure that when you have a big decision to make, you're not doing it through the lens of fear. [7:29] It's a very, very difficult one to work through. [7:31] But I almost use fear as a signal. [7:33] When I get scared, it's like, I know I have to do that thing. [7:36] I know there's something incredible on the other side of that. [7:39] You also write about the importance of having touch points and being really intentional about your expectations, writing it down, what you want for your 20s, what you want for your 30s, what you want for your 40s. [7:51] Where does one even begin? [7:52] I love a good plan. [7:54] We have to start with yourself. [7:55] Excuse the pun. [7:56] But that's really important, right? [7:57] You have to have a vision for yourself, for what type of person you want to be, what type of parent you want to be, what are your goals and your values and your principles and your purpose. [8:07] And when you have a vision for your work and life, you can anchor all of your decision making against that. [8:12] Everything that you decide to do and everything that you say no to. [8:15] But it really starts there. [8:17] It starts with you having a big picture of your life. [8:19] I make plans in decades. [8:20] I've always done that since my late 20s. [8:23] My 30 plan was really famous amongst my friends. [8:25] We all decided we should have one. [8:27] But it really helps you to stay grounded in what your intentions are. [8:31] It's not my quote, but I read somewhere once that, you know, it's like we kind of overestimate what we can do in a year and underestimate what we can do in 10. [8:39] And so I like to think and I know that life is long and it happens in seasons. [8:44] And if we have big goals for ourself, we really need to be concrete about those. [8:48] But we also need to ask for it. [8:49] We need to make it known. [8:51] And having a plan really helps you do that both for yourself but also to articulate it to everybody else around you. [8:56] So you're midway through the 40s. [8:58] Have you already kind of checked all the boxes? [9:00] I'm checking a few boxes. [9:02] You know, it's kind of happening for me right now. [9:04] But, you know, I'm a realist. [9:06] I know that not everything I want comes exactly when I want it. [9:10] And I think there's a time and there's a place and there's a moment. [9:13] The important thing is to really know what's important to you, to judge yourself by your own set of priorities and not to try to constantly live up to outside standards. [9:24] Coming up, from motherhood to mentorship, Emma Greed dishes about the real-life trade-offs for her success and her mission to open doors for other women. [9:33] Well, I think about what I'm doing now in this way of, like, how much can I share? [9:37] How much of this information can I get out of that? [9:39] And how much of that can turn somebody else's life around completely? [9:44] I read that you often, a few days a week during your morning commute, will talk to a female founder, often a black woman, who's reached out to you for help. [10:04] What was the genesis of that? [10:06] You know, almost every day. [10:07] Because it's my belief that, you know, talent is fairly evenly distributed, but opportunity isn't. [10:12] So if I can be somebody else's opportunity, I know for a fact that I've been helped in so many ways by people with more experience, by people that have invested in me, by people that have just seen something in me. [10:23] So when I meet someone and they say, hey, you know, I've started this company and I'm stuck at this revenue point and I really need to understand X, Y, and Z. [10:30] I mean, what does it take, like, half an hour of me on the phone just to understand where they are and how they can help and maybe give them a point of view that they wouldn't otherwise have access to? [10:39] To me, it feels like an obligation. [10:41] And I have some great chats as well. [10:43] You know, I get there's so many incredible small businesses in this country. [10:48] And I look at this as just an opportunity to really help unlock things for people. [10:54] And it really works. [10:55] Tell us about the 15% challenge, the venture and your vision for it. [11:00] Well, the 15% pledge was actually started by a dear friend of mine, Aurora James. [11:04] And it was a call to action after the murder of George Floyd for retailers to dedicate 15% of their annual spend towards black-owned brands. [11:12] And it has been an incredible gateway for so many black-owned businesses. [11:18] We're talking about over a $17 billion pipeline of opportunity for black-owned businesses. [11:23] Many retailers across the country, including Alta and Sephora, signed on to take the pledge. [11:28] And it was actually transformative. [11:29] When you go into those stores, you will see so many black-owned businesses there. [11:34] And I talk about it all the time, right? [11:35] Black-owned businesses aren't just for black people. [11:37] And so the fact that it's a win-win, both for the brand and for the business, because at the end of the day, we're trying to heighten a consumer experience here, make it better for customers. [11:48] So when a customer can come in and discover a brand-new company that they would never have had access to before, like, to me, what could be better than that? [11:56] You spend a lot of time in the book also talking about, obviously you're a mom of four, but you talk about miscarriages, IVF, using a surrogate. [12:07] But a lot of times people don't share openly about those experiences. [12:13] What made you decide to give voice to that? [12:15] Well, there are a lot of business books out there. [12:17] Not enough written by women. [12:19] Certainly not enough written by business women that are mothers of four. [12:22] And to me, there's an inextricable link. [12:25] You can't really talk about being a woman in business without addressing the conversation around children and families and family planning. [12:32] Now, look, it's not for everybody. [12:33] Not every woman has to have a child. [12:35] But if you are thinking about that, then there is a reality around the timing of it. [12:40] And I think far too often what's been kind of peddled more broadly is this idea like you've got to wait, you've got to put your career first. [12:47] And that just wasn't a reality for me. [12:49] So I really like to talk about what happened because I think it would be irresponsible to not address it. [12:55] Just like anything else in your life, if family is a priority and having kids is a priority, you will need to plan. [13:02] And you'll have to make the relevant sacrifices and the relevant trade-offs. [13:05] So I try throughout this book to really talk about and with honesty what I've had to do, what really had to give, what was the reality of my situation in the hope that somebody else might pick that up and say, oh, I can take something from that. [13:18] I can learn something from here. [13:19] Of course, you got a lot of buzz and maybe a little controversy when you talked about like spending three hours with your kids, right? [13:26] But at the same time, I think that so many working moms will appreciate the context in the book when you say, you know, no one ever asks Elon Musk, how does he balance family life while creating, you know, a multibillion dollar company? [13:39] And I think that you give mothers who are working outside of the house that grace that you may have it all but in different percentages at different times. [13:52] That is so true. So, so true. And, you know, honestly, what I was trying to say is that I believe that women are held to impossible standards. [14:01] This idea that we have to be the perfect mother. And if you're in business, absolutely infallible and a great partner and all of the rest on and on and on and on and on. [14:09] And that is just never a headline that would be written about a man. What I said is when you work five days a week, you come home and on the weekends, you're spent. [14:18] And for me, three hours with my kids, it's about what it gets because at the end of it, you know, I'm running errands. [14:23] We have things to do. And, you know, I just don't want to set an unrealistic standard and actually three fantastic hours without a phone in the hand, you know, a little use of the iPad. [14:34] That's okay. I don't want to pretend that I am doing things that I'm not doing. That drop off and pick up every day. I am not. That I'm making the packed lunches. [14:43] I am not. Absolutely, I have nannies. But again, the more we can talk openly and share about this, there are many, many different ways to be a great parent. [14:52] And I'm just sharing what that means for me in the hope that somebody else might go, you know what, that's okay. I have other priorities too. [14:59] I think that that permission that you kind of give to women who, again, are working outside of the house is so key because it's not always just the time that's spent. [15:10] It's actually the presence, right, when you're actually with them. [15:14] You have another theory that you talk about that I thought was so interesting and something that I'd never heard before because most people, when you're setting out in a career, [15:21] you tell people, you know, find what you're passionate about. And you say the opposite. You were like, find what you don't want to do. [15:30] Yes. [15:31] Which I'd never heard. [15:31] Find what you don't want to do and find what you're good at. You know, when I started out, it was back in the glorious days when you would go and work for free for companies. [15:39] You would do internships and take work experiences. And I went all around London finding all of these jobs that I loathed. I was like, not that, not that, not that. [15:46] But it was really, really great experience for me. Had I followed my passion, I don't know what I would be doing right now. [15:52] I followed what I was good at. I'm an excellent negotiator. I'm a really, really good leader. [15:57] And I found those skills early enough and followed what I was actually really good at doing. [16:03] I think that's a better piece of advice. That's that's going to be more useful for people if they figure out what they're good at and follow that. [16:10] What do you tell your young kids? I mean, you're at least your 12 year old now about discovering his passion. [16:16] I only really have one rule. I'm like, just be excellent at something. [16:20] I think when I look at my career, if we predicated on just having an obsession with something and going really deep and being excellent and uncompromising. [16:30] So I don't mind what it is, but I want you to have one thing that you care about and care about deeply enough to be good at it. That's enough for me. [16:37] And until you spend a lot of time also in the book talking about your mom who was working right and all the time single mom and and then you're getting the kids ready for school. [16:49] You're taking them to school. Sometimes you're going in and out of school. [16:53] But you said that there was something that she always told you that really potentially changed your trajectory. [16:59] Absolutely. My mom's helped me, you know, Emma, you're not better than anyone else, but nor is anyone better than you. [17:05] And I really believed it. I really believed that if I worked hard enough, anything was possible for me because no one was better than me. [17:13] And that was a really important place to come from because I just believed so, so deeply that it didn't matter where I'd come from. [17:23] It didn't matter my education. It didn't matter that I didn't have much. [17:26] If I applied myself, if I took what I wanted really seriously, that nothing was out of reach. [17:34] And, you know, I think that I'm kind of proof of that right now. [17:37] You have really a hand in everything, not only in fashion. By the way, you're on the Obama Foundation. By the way, you're an author. By the way, you have an Aspire with Emma Greed podcast. [17:49] Where did the podcast idea come from? [17:52] You know, it was really my way of figuring out how I could scale mentorship because, again, I do have so many women that reach out to me. [17:59] I have so many people that stop me and they want to answer, you know, they want me to answer questions. [18:04] And it also comes from my own experience. I didn't know what it meant to go out and raise capital. [18:08] I had no idea. Nobody ever came to me and said, like, I'm going to teach you how to negotiate. [18:13] I'm going to teach you how to interview. And so on my podcast, I really think about it as almost like edutainment. [18:18] This idea that I am going to teach you things that nobody is teaching you and lift the lid a little bit on what it means to have an incredible career [18:26] and climb the corporate ladder and what it means to start a business and be successful. [18:30] But as usual, and as you've seen in my book, you know, it's like a no holds barred type thing. [18:34] It's like very honest. It's very real. And I get to talk to some of the most incredible founders, entrepreneurs, [18:41] and people that are just doing it, like doing it for themselves. And I love it. [18:45] So appreciate your honesty. You talk about even cringe moments, you know, things that you're like, I can't believe I did this. [18:51] But, you know, I did. And I saw, you know, anger management, treatment and beyond. [18:57] Is there something that you are already sketching out for your 50s that you can share or you're not there yet? [19:03] You're still focused on the 40s. I always have a plan. I'm a woman with a plan. [19:07] And right now I feel an obligation to both share what I learned, but also to figure out how, you know, [19:14] like I have this theory in my head, like, wouldn't it be amazing if there were a million Little Emmas, [19:19] if a million girls that come from a place where there was, you know, very little expectation, [19:25] where they don't have the right education or necessarily the right resume, [19:29] and they rise to their full potential. And I am obsessed with that idea because I know it's possible [19:37] because I've done the journey myself. And so I think about what I'm doing now in this way of like, [19:42] how much can I share? How much of this information can I get out of that? [19:45] And how much of that can turn somebody else's life around completely? [19:50] So that's what I'm planning. That's what I'm thinking about. [19:53] Was there ever a failure that you had that you thought might define you, but it ended up redefining you? [20:00] 100%. I think the first company that I ever had in L.A., which was an abject failure. [20:04] And at the time, I thought it was the end of the world. And not just for me, because when you start a business, [20:09] I had a very successful business that had offices in New York and in London. And when I brought it to L.A., [20:15] it failed. And of course, you recruit people. So it affected other people, not just me. [20:21] What I've learned to do with failure is to really dissect it, to really take the learnings from it, [20:26] but also to separate it somehow, because I see men in business all the time. [20:31] They have failures and they dust themselves off and move on to the next one. [20:35] And so I've really learned and I always think about how I can borrow from the boys, [20:39] where there's a mentality and something that I can learn from. [20:42] And I know that failures are just part of doing things, right? [20:46] It's just part of doing a lot. They're to be expected. [20:49] You take the learnings and you go and you move on. [20:51] Is there a road not taken for Emma Greed? Had it not been, let's say, fashion, [20:57] is there something else that you think, you know, I might have liked to try my hand at? [21:03] Oh, I mean, so many things. I mean, right now, all I think about is A.I. [21:07] I mean, I wish I'd have been one of those guys. Can you imagine? [21:12] Yeah, I mean, so many things, but you get what you get and you get what you're good at. [21:18] And so that's been my journey so far. [21:20] Explain the quote that you are where you are because you have the audacity of a man. [21:25] Well, I have never apologized, you know, and I make no bones about trying hard, [21:31] about having failed, about having been, you know, having a single-minded focus [21:38] on what it is that I want and prioritizing myself. [21:41] And I think that that's behavior that we associate with men. [21:44] I think that we are going to associate it a lot more with women, [21:48] and I think we'll be better off for it. [21:49] Right now, I think we are desperate in the world for more women in positions of power. [21:55] And the reason I talk about money so much is because money and power are inextricably linked. [21:59] The two go hand in hand. [22:00] So when we are able to orientate ourselves around conversations with money, [22:05] we will get more power. [22:06] And we need that not just in business. [22:08] We need it politically, economically, everywhere in our world. [22:11] And that's how and where I'm really fixated right now. [22:16] Start with yourself, Emma Green. [22:18] We thank you so much for the time and conversation. [22:22] Really appreciate it. [22:23] This has been All Access with Lindsay Davis. [22:25] Thanks so much for streaming with us.